I did this poem for homework. Can't you just tell that I can't write an upbeat poem?
Land of …
Seashores, oily as a teen’s hair,
Vibrant forests with retreating borders,
Mystical towering mountains capped with acid rain,
Dirty rivers flowing with poisons,
Soon to be excavated plains of dead grass.
Confused people who steal for loved ones,
People who need hopeful dreams of…
“The free and the brave.”
“God bless
My home sweet home.”
8 comments:
Ms. Rivett was given a model poem and asked to come up with quality adjectives to make her own poem. Me? I would have just "filled in the blanks" but not Lynn! She put her own twist on it. She was afraid that I was going to make her redo it, but I was impressed with her creativity.
I'm still having a hard time believing you. Just like when you said you were prowd of me for writing. I couldn't have gotten it publish even if I wanted it to be. People would say that critasium was better and now I believe them. Please tell me something that is wrong with it.
The dictionary defines criticism as "a judgment or review." Most people associate criticism with negative comments only, but criticism can also be positive. I enjoyed your poem and it surprised me, because it was not what I expected. You are a creative thinker. BELIEVE IT!
Creative thinkers can believe what they want. I just can't believe you when you say that. Well maybe just a little.
You wanna fight about it?! ;)
Thanks for sharing your poem. I think it's creative too
Nice. Let's see more poetry! I like your word choice "vibrant" and "retreating" (where most would have said "receding"). Very nice. I feel your angst over the mess you've inherited.
very accurate.
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